Happy New Year!

Yes, I am aware it is January 3rd and I am a little late.  But at least it's still January!

So Thanksgiving whizzed by, as did Christmas.  Time seems to be a blur sometimes, holidays the blurriest of times.  Looking back I realize I really am seeing my life flash before my eyes.  My eldest will 16 next month, my youngest 14.  She'll start high school next fall.  How the heck did all these years get past me?  

One of my resolutions for this year to be more present.  For myself in my own life, for my kids, for my husband.  I need to focus on the now, or I will again end up in some future present wondering how I got there. and forgetting a lot of things that happened along the way because I was just going through the motions. 

I remember when I was back in high school, (way too many years ago), and we used to wonder what it would be like in the year 2000.  "Oh we'll be 32 then", we'd squeal to each other, like that was so old!  When one is 16 it is hard to imagine 32.  But when one is approaching 43, 32 is but a memory.  

I've heard it said many times, by many people, "The older one gets the quicker it goes" and it is true.  I realize my life is probably more than 1/2 over.  Will I reach 86?  Neither of my parents did, only 1 grandparent lived past 80.  

I have decided this will be my quote for the year:

  

“The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, worry about the future, or anticipate troubles, but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly.” ~Buddha

What do I want to do with the 2nd half of my life?  I have a better idea of who I am now.  I like myself, more now, than I probably ever did.  (Not physically necessarily, but who I am, inside.)  

The thoughts are swirling in my head again.  Another resolution is to get to this blog more often and get these thoughts onto "paper" if for no one but me.  Writing helps me think things through, it helps me remember, and maybe it can bring others wisdom.  Or it can be a legacy to my kids. It will be 3 years in April since I started this blog.  I have recorded some stories from my past, I have ranted about things that I am passionate about about, I have written about things that have hurt me.  I also realize, looking back, that I have changed in the last 3 years.  I think I've mellowed, I think I have become more accepting of myself and others, and hopefully, I think I have become kinder. 

The Traveling Wilbury's put it well in "End of the Line":

"Well it's all right, even if you're old and grey
Well it's all right, you still got something to say
Well it's all right, remember to live and let live
Well it's all right, the best you can do is forgive"

How my sinuses have stalled my blogging!

When I first started blogging my intent was to record some events that have happened in my life, get some things off my chest and hopefully get my very opinionated opinion out into the "world". I miss blogging! I have now figured out why I have hardly blogged in over 2 months: I have been sick! Yes, I know I have been sick, I have been battling a sinus infection thingy for over 2 months. But it wasn't until today, whilst talking with my very compassionate doctor, that I realized just how an infection can wreak havoc on one's body.

I have had a general malaise about me for months. My sinus symptoms started in late July. At first I thought it was allergies, we've had lots of rain and I thought maybe the mold was getting to me. I let it go for about a month before I visited my doctor. I went to see her in late August. She said my head was "full" and it looked like a sinus infection and gave me antibiotics. After a few days my symptoms seemed to be clearing up, I felt better and could almost breathe again. But a few days after I stopped the antibiotics, the symptoms came back with a vengeance. Right side completely plugged up, no sniffling, breathing or blowing, just stuck. Pressure in my sinus cavity and behind my eyes, headache, feeling blah. I waited a few days and called my doc, who decided I needed another round of good old antibiotics. This time they did nothing. I knew I had a physical coming up, so instead of paying another co-pay and going in to my doctor, I decided to suffer for the last 2 weeks whilst waiting for today's appt. Not really a smart move on my part.

So today I go for my physical. Yes, I still have a raging sinus infection. Not good seeing as I already had 2 rounds of antibiotics. Yes, any kind of infection raging in ones system can make one weak and fatigued ALL THE TIME! Yes, it made perfect sense that I complained of feeling like crap ALL THE TIME. No, I should not have waited another 2 weeks before coming in and getting stronger meds, ooops.

So now I have a really strong, really expensive antibiotic and a steroid. 5 days of steroids and 5 days of antibiotics. Both will stay in my system for 10 days, after which if I am not 100% better I was told to call my doctor ASAP for further evaluation. I am really hoping this does the trick. I have never had sinus issues like this before. I feel like I could sleep until Christmas.

And I miss my blog. As I lay in bed each night gasping for air through my mouth, I have all these wonderful ideas of things to blog about. But alas, morning comes and I am exhausted before I leave my bed and it just goes downhill from there. The only reason I have been able to blog this right now was because of an injection of Reese's Peanut butter cups and iced tea ; ) Sugar and caffeine, it does a body good.

When the head aches, all the body is the worse.
~English Proverb~

Other People's Blogs

I stumbled upon this woman's blog a while back and I just love her writing. She says so much of what I'd like to say if I was only a better writer. She writes of coming out of patriarchy, among other things, (particularly about being a mom and her kids), but I really like her religion/God posts the best. I really agreed with this post and thought I'd share.

Oh, and this is a good one too!

May! When Did May Get Here?

Seriously, when is this time thing going to slow down a bit? It's like ever since I turned 40 I have gone over the top of the hill, and I am literally racing down the other side.

I had big plans of being a part of NaBloPoMo this month, but seeing as it is already May 2nd, I've already blown it. I guess I can strive for June, and with the way the months have been flipping by me, it will be here before I know it anyway.

We had a major milestone yesterday in our family....my eldest "graduated" from 8th grade. For regular readers, you know we unschool, so I use the term graduate loosely. It was really, to us, more of a rite of passage than a graduation, but we participated with our homeschooling co-op, and I don't think my idea of a rite of passage ceremony instead of a graduation ceremony would have gone over too well. So a graduation it was. I do plan to blog about it and put up pictures. Hopefully tomorrow.

Right now I just felt the need to check in to my poor neglected blog. Life's been busy the last few weeks, I think things will slow down a bit for us now heading into summer. Maybe I will feel time slow down a bit too, at least I hope so.

It's My Blogiversary!

Today is the one year anniversary of the start of my blog. As is usual with everything in my life, that was a fast year. This post will be the 175th one written since my start. All in all I don't find that too bad. That averages to just about a post every other day. (Math is not my forte so if something is amiss in that statement, keep it to yourselves!) I tried to blog everyday in January, and failed miserably, so I am happy to look back over the year and realize I had better effort than I thought.

My whole purpose in starting the blog was to get some thoughts out, write about things that interested me or that I had a passion for, and leave a legacy of myself on "paper". I had initially hoped it would help my family and friends keep informed on what was going on in my life. I have a sister who isn't too far from me and a brother all the way in AZ. Even though I informed my brother and SIL of my blog, I think only my brother has visited, and I think only once. I have no evidence my sister has ever taken the time to read it. So be it. If they had blogs, I would read them. I admit it hurts a bit that my own family has no interest in things I am passionate about, or wants to check in and see what I have to say about my girls. Such is life I suppose.

I am heartened by the fact that many people I have never met IRL visit my blog. I have made many online friends over the years, and some of them really have become life long buddies. We have groups where we chat and we like to check in with each other daily. If we don't hear from someone for a while we try to contact them in other ways to figure out if they are ok. I never would have thought 20 years ago, when I was barely computer literate that so much of my life would now revolve around my computer. I love my computer, my friends live in it (I stole that : )

Of course I know some RL (real life) friends read my blog, but so few of you ever comment I don't know who you are. I do wish those who visit would say hi. You don't have to comment on the post, just comment on being here. I have a feed on my sidebar that shows me where people come from who read this, but it doesn't tell me who you are. Won't you please write me a little a hello, on this, the 1st anniversary of my foray into blogdom?

So tomorrow will be April 27th, but it will also be the start of my 2nd blog year. I hope I can keep it interesting and I hope I can find as much, if not more, time to post than I did this last year. Thanks to those of you who faithfully read no matter how boring or mundane the topic....I think you know who are : )

“I think the pleasure of completed work is what makes blogging so popular. You have to believe most bloggers have few if any actual readers. The writers are in it for other reasons. Blogging is like work, but without coworkers thwarting you at every turn. All you get is the pleasure of a completed task.”
~Scott Adams~

Minutes, Hours, Days, Weeks

I just realized it's been a week since I wrote a blog post. I don't even know where the time went. It's not like I am super busy. I work part-time two days a week. I have co-op on Friday. I drive my girls places (like friends houses and kyuki-do lessons), take them to appointments (like doctors and dentists), take them to the library for books or anime night, try and keep the girls engaged during the day when I am not driving them places (that pesky homeschooling thing we do ; ) clean up after the cats (that hairball thing they do), go to the grocery store so we can eat, occasionally do the laundry (to keep my hubby happy), iron for hubby (so he'll look presentable at work) cook dinner at least a few nights a week, watch American Idol, etc., etc.

Writing it down makes it seem like I am busier than I am. Or maybe I should just cut myself some slack because I am busy. Looking over my list I realize I didn't even add anything I do for me. I suppose sitting at the computer and checking my email or Facebook would count as me time. Now if I only had a comfier desk chair I might enjoy it more. But then I'd probably see my time go by even more quickly, because if my chair was comfier, I might never get up, LOL.

I'm always so tired during the week, I really look forward to the weekend. But that just makes the week seem to go by quicker. Pretty soon several weeks have gone by and one wonders where the month has gone. I'm not sure how to remedy the problem. I suppose I should look forward to every day during the week. Not just live for Friday. Such is the life of a working family. We look forward to the weekend when dad is home and we can sleep in and hang out. No one has a class, no one needs to work. We can just be, our lives are our own, we don't need to be on anyone else's time schedule.

I want to look forward to retirement, but I don't want to be old. There's just no pleasing me I think. I want the best of everything, and I want it now. I want to be retired, I want my time to be my own, I don't want my husband to have to go to work. And I want it now, while we're young enough to enjoy it. So there!

(And of course it would be nice if these middle aged hormones didn't make me so moody ; )

NaBloPoMo

After reading a post by Stephanie, I thought I would give this NaBloPoMo thing a try. Since starting my blog last April, I have yet to blog everyday. It's a big task, really, trying to find the time to jot down some thoughts each day. Thoughts that I hope at least one other person might find somewhat interesting, or reasonable, or at the very least coherent.

Today I find myself sick with a bad cold. And womanly issues. So really, the last thing I want to do is sit at my computer and try to process an organized thought. Let alone then transfer that organized thought into words to put on my computer screen. I do tend to think about all sorts of interesting things, but usually late at night, as I lay in bed, no where near my computer. And alas, by morning all my wonderful blog posts have been lost in dreamland.

So I am making the commitment to blog something each day. Whether it be what I'm making for dinner, or maybe it will be some wonderful life altering realization, or it might even be just something funny my kids or cats did. Whatever it is, I am pledging right now that I will post to my blog every day this month. That's the requirement for joining NaBloPoMo, and since I joined, I guess I'd better follow through. Wish me luck : )

Blog Award

I was given this blog award by a dear online friend, Deanna.

The rules for this award are as follows:

1) The winner gets to put the logo on his/her blog.

2) Link to the person you received your award from.

3) Nominate at least 7 other blogs.

4) Put links to those blogs on yours.

5) Leave a message on the blogs of the people you have nominated.

There are so many blogs I read, written by very good online friends, that were already nominated by others. So please don't feel slighted if you don't see you blog. It means someone else already recognized you : )

1 - Phoenix Hopes

2 - Full Bellies, Happy Kids

3 - Po Moyeu - In My Opinion

4 - Homeschool the Revolution

5 - Lovin' Life At Home

6 - Memoirs of an Unschooling Teacher

7 - Life As I know It