27 July 2009


I see it's been a week since I posted to my poor neglected blog. My step-daughter got married on Saturday, so I was little busy last week making sure me and hubby and our two girls would be dressed appropriately. As for me, after visiting almost every woman's clothing store in northern IL, I ended up wearing the first dress I bought. Could have saved myself a lot of time and aggravation, but at least now I know there is nothing out there in retail land that looks good on me, hmph!

So back to the wedding. It was lovely. Raina (my step-daughter) had originally planned on having a large, elaborate wedding this December. It was becoming a much larger event than she had hoped for, so early last spring they (her and her fiance, Erik) decided to make it a "family and close friends event only" and moved it to Erik's family's home and moved it up to July. I think there were probably 40 people total in attendance, including the entire bridal party. It was still very elegant and formal and everyone seemed to have a nice time.

Here's a picture of the lovebirds:

I never had a wedding. I moved out of my parents home and eventually in with my boyfriend (now hubby). Then I got pregnant, LOL. When you do things backwards, a big wedding is a bit redundant. John and I got married at the courthouse in March, and we had a backyard pig roast reception in August. When I look back, a wedding would have been nice, but with age comes wisdom and it really is an awful lot of money to spend on a party. We spent an awful lot of money just going to Raina's wedding. She wanted us in pictures, plus her dad had to walk her down the aisle, so we spent a pretty penny making sure we'd all look up to snuff.

My sister had a big wedding. My parents were paying for it so they got to call the shots. It was nice, about 100 people, at a country club. I do remember it being a lot of fun. But a few years later I remember my sister saying she wished she had been given money for a down-payment on a house instead of a wedding. The novelty wears off. Yes, you have nice pictures, but she says she barely remembers the day, having to run around and talk to people and thanking them for coming, and making sure everything was done properly.

I'm not dissing weddings. If someone has the money, go for it. Weddings can be a lot of fun and certainly special to the couple involved. But I don't think people should go into hock to give their kids a wedding. And given the choice, I think kids nowadays should think realistically, what is more important, a big wedding or a place to live? Just a few weeks ago my youngest and I were out running errands and we saw this girl on the side of the road with a sign that said: "Car Wash, Help Us Pay For Our Wedding". If you need to hold a car wash to pay for your wedding, maybe you should just go to the courthouse. (They actually made it into our local paper.)

John and I have two other daughters, so obviously the wedding thing will come up for us again. We got lucky this time, Raina and her fiance wanted to pay for their own wedding. I think my own girls are a bit more relaxed about the wedding thing. Neither is really a girlie girl and they don't have romantic notions of a prince charming and a fairy tale wedding. I was talking with my youngest about her dad having to wear a fancy suit to Raina's wedding and how he wished he could wear a Hawaiian shirt. That's our kind of wedding. Catherine said we could wear Hawaiian shirts to her wedding : )

In my dreams, one day before we die, my hubby and I will renew our vows on a beach somewhere. He can wear one of those Miami style suits, a white cotton, breezy suit with a Hawaiian shirt underneath, and I can find some kind of flowy summer dress, and we can both be barefoot. Maybe our kids will be there, maybe some grand kids. We could go out and eat lobster afterwards. That's my kind of wedding.

One look
One smile
One touch
One embrace
One kiss
One love
Two people
Two minds
Two souls
Two destinies
One road
One journey
One ending

- Melissa Higgins -


unschoolermom said...

They look like a very happy couple! That is awesome!

Kelsey and I did not have a big wedding. We had a small ceremony that revealed a little about each of us. It was just perfect for us. :^)

Kris said...

Spending money on a big wedding has never struck a chord with me. Many young couples could buy a house or new cars with that kind of cash. On top of that is the stress, I have been in several friend's weddings and they were ALL basket cases by the time the day arrived. To each their own but I'd rather skip all that. All that said, your daughter's wedding pictures are lovely.